We have it drilled into our heads that an eating disorder is about our behaviors (use and abuse) around food. Once we stop binging, purging, over-exercising, restricting, taking laxatives or diuretics, we are recovered. It would seem that stopping the behaviors of an eating disorder would mean the same as an alcoholic stopping drinking, or a drug addict arresting her drug use. Why are eating disorders placed in the same category as addictive substances we can CHOOSE to never use again? We NEVER have to drink alcohol or use drugs to stay alive, and we DO have to eat 3-6 times per DAY, just to sustain life. So why put eating disorders in the same category?
Recovering from an eating disorder can be much more difficult at times because,
- Food is legal
- We need food to live
- The chemical reactions within the body when using eating disorder behaviors ARE as addictive as drugs or alcohol.
So due to these differences from addiction recovery, we need to take eating disorder recovery MUCH more seriously than we currently do. If it were similar, it would be like telling a drug addict/alcoholic they had to consume JUST enough drugs/alcohol every day to never get high or drunk ever again, but that they’d have to face it AND use it daily. This would be unheard of! Yet we expect people to recover from an addiction just as painful and still eat enough to support life.
We expect them to eat enough to become so anxious, they feel like jumping off a bridge, and then we end up telling them to breathe or journal. I hope I’m getting this point across that we need better tools when we expect these sweet folks to do the impossible.
We often tell people to journal to calm down, however the journaling, if any, often happens at a time when they are trying to figure out why they just USED an eating disorder behavior. Spoiler alert, you’ll NEVER “figure it out” this way. We can only find answers by tapping into the anxiety when it’s at its highest point. This is usually RIGHT before an eating disorder behavior is used. You know that itching burning desire to use a behavior? It feels like you’ll crawl out of your skin if you don’t? Yes, THAT’S the one. This is the time we need to get MOST curious, and this is also the time your mind will be most filled with issues you haven’t named. Time for a “Free Write Insight” worksheet!
This will be the hardest thing you’ve ever done, and another spoiler alert, you’ll NEVER feel like doing it. There are SO many worksheets to distract yourself for enough time that the urge to use behaviors goes away, but how many times can you do the same distracting worksheet just to stop yourself from relieving your anxiety?
As an eating disorder professional, I couldn’t STAND this, so I wrote my own. This sheet assumes you’ll probably end up using behaviors and has NO intention of distracting you from doing this. This explores the crazy feelings that are so overwhelming RIGHT before a behavior is used. The cool thing is that NOW, if you end up using behaviors, you’ll have a MUCH deeper insight into yourself, and what might be the root of it all.
This can all be discussed with your therapist at a later time. Without this level of anxiety, this worksheet is useless. And trying to figure it out any other time is rough, because in your right mind, you’d never do these things and are baffled by the fact that you get so overwhelmed that you resort to using and abusing food.
Try this next time you feel the overwhelm, immediately before the use of any eating disorder behavior. We might as well learn something if the behaviors are going to come anyway.
Wherever you are on your journey to RECOVERY, I’m with you all the way! Keep it up, sweet ones!
If you are looking for more support in YOUR Recovery and Life, I would be honored if you became a Ramey Nutrition Insider. You’ll find fun fun support freebies in my first email! To subscribe https://mailchi.mp/scarlettrameyofficial/rameynutritioninsiders
If you’re into it, feel free to share this with someone you KNOW needs to hear these words!
Yours in love and support,
Scarlett Ramey
P.S. Hope to see you in the comments. Let’s rally together during this time and stay connected in supporting YOYE Recovery journey. The world deserves the BEST of you.♥️